At this time of the year I am on a “wind down” to the Winter Solstice. Visits to ancient sites are rare, but when an opportunity arises like the full moon and a free evening, well what can a jobbing hedge druid do but heed the call. Actually, the call was pulling at my feet the day before, at the height of the Hunter’s Moon, but it transpired that both Kal and I were free on the third day of its phase. So be it.
The temperature was sub-zero, the ground dry but frost-laden, the sky was heavy with cloud and the moon was nowhere to be seen. Yet still, the lure was too strong and the moon pulled us out towards the Derbyshire/Shropshire border as we headed for the obvious place to go – Lud’s Church. Why obvious? Well, I’ve been feeling the presence of the energy form that I have come to know as Gwalchmai all year. Gwalchmai directly corresponds to the later Arthurian name of Gawain. The one site that I knew that was definitely associated with this energy is Lud’s Church. With Gwalchmai one of the god Lugh/Lud’s offspring, it seemed a natural destination for a moonlight walk.
At this point I will simply re-iterate one important point – this moon is called Hunter’s Moon in the old English designation. You’ll come to see why this is important later. For now, the tale continues with me blissfully unaware of this fact, and with my staff and trusty sidekick in tow, parking at the Scout Camp car park at the top of the hill of the valley through which the Black Brook flows. It had been cloudy all the way to the stopping point, but now the clouds ‘miraculously’ parted to reveal the full glory of the full and close moon, which shone with such power that it seemed like the area was floodlit with a pale beam that cast deep dark shadows.
We went through the beech tree portal at the bottom of the vale with only a few mishaps on the part of Kal and his inappropriate footwear. We began to count the number of falls just as a kind of memento The trees seemed pleased that we were there, but sleepy and distant in terms of communication. I let them be. We shouldn’t be going around waking things up just because we are able! We had already been given that message a few weeks before at Gawton’s Stone where we had disturbed a sleeping earth spirit. The advice was heeded this time and we hurried onwards up the slope as though following a pale blue torch’s path. Kal remarked that on any other night this would have been unbearably creepy. True! Yet the reaching dark fingers of the bare trees were enveloping arms shielding us from the edges of the path, I felt. Everything felt very positive and benign on this night.
Back Door Men
As we approached the entrance to the chasm we prepared ourselves mentally and spiritually for the endeavour. Once inside we quickly realised that the floor of the chasm was a sea of mud. There was no way we could wade through that lot and come out with both feet still shod! We opted for Plan B – the back entrance. Now, I had only been that way once before, and that was in daylight. Nevertheless, I have this in-built GPS ability which means that if I have been somewhere before I can usually navigate myself there again, no matter what the circumstances. Kal spent much of the ensuing slog up the slippery hillside questioning this ability as he cracked puddle after puddle of icy mud with his inferior footwear and yelped in response each time. Eventually we reached the entrance high up on the hillside. I don’t know how I do it, I just do. I’m blessed. I think the ‘fall count’ went up to two on the way up.
The stage was set for adventure. The set was bathed in a spotlight of moon-blue which perfectly complemented the frosty grass and trees around us. We sat on dry but cold stones and Kal huddled into himself – he wouldn’t even be trying to do anything this evening. However, I felt the time was right for something. I just needed to get into the right frame of mind….
Folly in the Frost
The most foolish thing to do that night would be to go into the chasm itself. So, that’s exactly what I did. I ventured in, feeling for the way in which I might be directed, feeling for the strong energy spot. I asked to be taken somewhere that I could meet with Gwalchmai and could pursue my quest to know him better. With only the aid of a small head-torch I found a crevice to climb up into, which led to a perfect pinnacle to sit on in the moonlight. As I stilled myself in preparation for a mental journey I heard a snuffle and the movement of heather on the ridge close by to me. In my quieted mental state it didn’t bother me, and soon the animal nearby turned away, also undisturbed by my presence. That was a positive sign – I was blending with Nature nicely – a part of it, not a disturbance to it.
Only that day I had been listening to a podcast of one of Alan Watts’ lectures, during which he had talked about the best way to meditate. His technique was one of total stillness, on “non attachment” to the content of the mind during the process of meditation. I wanted to try this out for myself. I spent ten times longer than I normally do on such things, but eventually there was complete stillness inside my head, and only the occasional sound from Nature outside of it. At that moment images began to appear.
- Gawain/Gwalchmai. A beautiful youthful face of a man with a sheen of copper, turquoise and gold. Hawkish, elvish features. I knew it was the Hawk of May himself. I was getting a rare glimpse of the Winter phase of his being. That was how I interpreted it at the time.
- A gold-topped rosewood cane. It could have been gold or brass. The top is shown in detail. It has a Celtic knot type of design, and was worn smooth by use. The owner of this cane has a great deal of very important information to impart to me.
- An old style hunting dog who, as he turns to face me, grows antlers and changes into a stag with a glint in his eyes.
Remember I said that the full moon was named “Hunter’s Moon” in the old English naming? At the time I had no idea what the name of the moon was, and only learned it when I went to check upon writing up this post. I swear, you can’t write these coincidences! I live them. They’re the vibrant threads that connect me to Nature through all time and experience. Beautiful, haunting, and thrilling all at once.
The symbolism of the dog and the stag was something that I felt I should research a bit more, or at least think about deeply. The dog is the hunter. The stag is the quarry. Even though they seem in opposition, what the image seemed to be saying was that these eternal “enemies” were in fact the same animal. Both needed to understand the other in order to survive.
How this relates to my own work in the future I haven’t yet understood. Will I begin to see things from two perspectives now? There are so many interpretations of that symbolism that I can’t begin to relate it to any possible future event. In the context of the other visions I can only allow the person with the gold-topped cane to come to me through intuitive connection.
Perhaps this person is seeking me as much as I am seeking them? Perhaps my work with Gwalchmai will lead to this connection being realised. Time will tell. For now, it’s Winter, and all thoughts of further druid work are being packed away for “The Stillness” between January and February. There’s one last adventure left this year – the Winter Solstice.
Gwas.
It’s once again been too long since I’ve caught up on your blog! What a grand winter adventure! Perhaps your visions and images are simply a prelude for next cycle, on what to begin “hunting” when the wheel turns? When you talk about meditation and the images I was struck by some of the Jungian Active Imagination work I’ve been doing recently. The images tell the story and pass the wisdom. It’s then you’re job to figure out what it all means! I wish I could say that I have a walking cane like the one pictured but, alas, I do not. 🙂
I look forward to going back and getting caught up on things, once again. Perhaps on this turning of the wheel I can stay a little more up to date?
Well BR, what an absolute pleasure it is to have you back on the blog. You always have such kind and insightful comments to add. “Jungian Active Imagination Work”! What a mouthful, and yet such a powerful tool!
A friend of mine, a wise woman indeed, offered me some advice similar to this concept once. She was saying that her work was simple and easy, her spirits ‘tamed’. I protested that my guidance often was quite challenging, but that I simply accepted the challenge. She said to me, “Why don’t you ask the spirits why they want you to do X,Y and Z?” I blinked – could I do that? “Of course!” she chided. “If my spirit guides say something I don’t like I tell them to F off!” Her wonderful earthiness grounded me immediately, and the idea stuck with me.
Of course, we may be challenging ourselves – it may be the anima or shadow within us. Or it may be something else. Ultimately the source doesn’t matter if the words are trusted and progress is both positive and tangible.
Don’t beat yourself up about staying up to date. That’s why the wheel turns to Winter. So we can catch up and relax a bit! Welcome back for Winter. 🙂