Knights Pilgrimage 2 of 5 The Forest of Dean

Forest of Dean

In my previous post I told how I was waylayed on to a pilgrimage journey. I had set out for a short trip in Wales and ended up on course for the forest of Dean some 180 miles away! Crazy. Fortunately the weather was fabulous. It could have been confused for a sunny summer’s day and yet we are on the eave of spring. After a long…long drive I arrived at the edge of the Forest of Dean. I had been here a few times before. One more memorable event was when I had a vision to get in touch and repair my relationship with my sister. I wasn’t expecting something as amazing as that, but hey you never know.

Not really knowing the road structure around the forest. I just parked up at a convenient spot and trundled into the forest. It is an amazing forest I have to say. To me, it feels a lot younger than Alderley Edge and Delamere forests with which I am more familiar with. Hmmm A kind of fresh cleansed feeling, if you know what I mean? Maybe it was a feeling of up coming spring? I don’t know.

Anyway, I had walked along the paths for about an hour, which isn’t long in this size of forest, when I felt the urge to leave the beaten track and wander into the undergrowth. It was about 3 in the afternoon and I wasn’t too worried about getting lost, not with the trusty clink of my dowsing rods.

I asked my dowsing rods whether this was the place that I was to start my pilgrimage? Yes. That was good, but since I had already had a message to say my quest was complete. I wanted more answers. So I determined some more answers.

• Was my quest complete? Yes.
• Was this pilgrimage to do with my quest? Yes. That was rather confusing.
• Did I need to complete this pilgrimage? No.
• Would it provide me with some insight if I did? Yes. This was a strong YES by the way.

I guess that is good enough for me to burn a couple hundred pounds worth of petrol. Hmmm! I asked if there was a particular place in the forest that I needed to be? Yes. Taking a lesson from Gwas’s dowsing, I asked how far this was? Between 20/30 minute walk. That was OK with me so I set of following the rods through the semi-dense trees of the Forest of Dean.

I  would occasionally check my watch (iPhone) and finally 30 minutes had passed and I had not come to a stop. Why do the rods take you on a windy route? Why?? Anyway, I stopped. It was getting really hot and I was getting a bit worried. Sun set was around 2 hours away and my iPhone signal was nil-point! I asked the rods again, how many minutes walk and they responded 20/30 minutes! What the Great Prophet Zarquon! I double checked that nothing was interfering with my dowsing, there wasn’t.

Lost couple

I was ready to quit, when I heard a noise. Remember I was in the undergrowth. Not on a path. I waited a few seconds and heard a couple of people some distance ahead of me. From the sounds of it, they were arguing. I listend for a minute, but could make out what was going on. So I decided to get about my business. Again, I followed the rods.They pointed in the direction of the talking people. But knowing that they swerve a lot I wasn’t too worried and off I went. A few seconds later I came out on the path. Right in front of the arguing couple (yes, they were a couple).

Fortunately I spotted them before they spotted me and I was able to slip my dowsing rods up my sleeve.

• A useful tactic me and Gwas have found. Although make sure your rods don’t have a sharp edge. Which alas one of mine has. Ouch!

What is a guy supposed to do in such a situation? You can’t exactly just hang around until other people pass you by. Thinking quickly, I knelt down and re-tied my shoe laces. Hmmm aren’t you wondering how I did that whilst keeping my dowsing rods stuck up my sleeve? Exactly! Alas, at this moment the couple saw me and the woman (must have been late 30’s) ran up to me.

“Thank God!”, or something like that, “We’re lost. You couldn’t direct us to the road could you?”

I want to pause for a moment here and really reflect. I am in a massive forest which google informs me is about 10km by 15km (give or take). I have no idea where I am parked. Nor indeed where I entered the forest. I have been following a dowsing rod through the undergrowth (not paths). What kind of a response could I give this couple?

As I thought about a suitable response, they guy came over and said, “we’re not really lost, just got a bit turned around is all.” I swear to Zarquon that I was an inch away from bursting into laugher (quite possibly of the maniacal kind).

Before I could respond, the woman turned to the guy and gave him a mouthful. “Of course we’re lost…” I watched them as they argued, eventually the woman turned to me and apologised. “sorry, could you please help us out?”

“I don’t know where the road is i’m afraid” I responded and got a weird look. “What? Can we use your phone?” I took out my phone and looked at it. “No signal, sorry.” I could see that she was getting into a state again. “Well, how are you going to get out of here?”

You know, they say that women are better at multi-tasking, I don’t know. But I’m quite good at multi-thinking. During the conversation that was happening, my thoughts were reflecting on. “What will I say if they ask me how I’m going to get out of here?”

 At this question, the laughter that had been building up in me escaped, fortunately I managed to contain it into a sheepish chuckle and a grin. “I am a dowser, I am going to dowse my way out”

Pause…

Priceless Moments

I am telling you dear readers, there is only one purpose in life. That is to experience such moments. I can’t even begin to explain it. Truly you have to have been there. Please use your imagination and make it as hilarious as possible.

It felt like an eternity that they stared at the dowsing rods in my hand. Words completely escaped them. I was in a state of bliss, that was ready to explode into laughter. How I kept a straight face was unbelievable.

Eventually and I mean a real long perceived time later the guy said to me, “Your going to use those to find your way out?” I looked them both and said, Yes. Then rather cheekily I asked them, “would you like to come with me?”

Another priceless moment passed and I asked them whether they had a car? They said yes. I said, “would you like me to take you to it.” O my Zarquon. That moment was worth the whole pilgrimage. They were completely non-plussed and took a few steps back to confer.

Whilst they did I did a quick step back myself and asked the rods whether I could find their car (just checking), the answer was Yes. A quick thought came to me. Was this why I was here? Yes. O crap, that changed the dynamic the other way completely!

“Excuse me” I said, “I am quite good at finding my way out of places with these?” If you’re lost already, what’s the harm?” I could see them wavering, so I added, “and we might get to a place where my phone might work.” I looked at them and said, “my name’s, Kal” and stuck out my hand.

Faith

Beverly, Darren and I started to walk down the path, they followed behind me, though there was no reason to. I suspect they were scared. After only about 10 seconds we hit our first problem. The rods had started down the path they were already walking. Some feet away they angled off into the undergrowth and without thinking I stepped inside. A moment later I realised that they hadn’t followed me. I walked back to the path. “Are you ok?”

“You’re going to go into there?” I shrugged, “Yes,” They weren’t convinced. I stepped back on the path and said, “look”.

I held the rods in front of me and asked out loud,

• “Can I find Darren and Beverly’s car” The rods swung in.
• “Point me in the direction of the car” they pointed into the undergrowth.
• “How many minutes will it take to reach their car?” 10, 20, 30, 35

“See? We’ll get to your car in 35 minutes. You have got to have a little faith guys. Plus it’s getting late. So I’m going if your not?” I think that was the convincer. Being left on there own was too much. So it was off into the undergrowth. As we trampled through the forest, they asked question after question.

• How did I know they worked?
• How long have you been doing this?
• Is it magic?
• What if it doesn’t work?

I felt really sorry for them. Especially when we got onto a track occasionally. They would search up and down for anyone else. But it was getting darker and no one was around. A real tester was when they saw a dog in the distance. They saw it and looked at each other. Civilisation! The dog vanished into the undergrowth too and they were torn in two as to whether to wait to see if the owner passes or to carry on with me.

Frankly, I was getting worried too because after dropping these guys off I had to be finding my car. And it was no good asking them to drive me to it, as I didn’t know where it was parked. Did I mention the size of the forest? We continued for another 20 minutes with me answering their questions as best I could and keeping them up-lifted.

Then we got onto a path and we could hear cars in the distance. The relief on their faces was amazing. They thanked me profusely “we can find our way from here, thank you thank you”

Sigh!

I wondered if I would have really found their car, but time for my own. So I asked for direction and time. And got an answer of 10 minutes.

Just a note. It is always good to ask for a time frame. For many reasons. For instance I was in the forest for about two hours. So if I’d have got a time of more than 2 hours then there is something wrong. Second, if it said 10 minutes and I hadn’t found anything in, say 15, then, again something is amiss.

I was quite relieved at the 10 minute time frame, How come? I had a niggling worry. Had I been going to my car and not theirs? Or was I now still going to theirs? A few questions of the rods allayed my fears (a bit) and I set off. Luckily, all the while I could hear cars, so that was a bonus.

It was probably about 5 minutes (I was walking fast) that I hit a path. My rational brain took over. It was really dark now. And I decided to follow the path instead, towards the light of the cars.

What a weird experience, but it wasn’t over. Stay tuned as Darren and Beverley’s tale continues…

Kal Malik